Horse Tales

Okay...I will start typing as soon as I take a few deep breaths. I will not give much background information here, or interesting sidebars for that matter, because my faithful readers (both of them!) will not need it. Oops...except for this...50 is a magic number at this point in my life, as I am nearing 50 chronologically as well as nearing 50 pounds overweight...the overweight tidbit having direct relation to this tale. ) So, on Christmas I am trying to have a semi- interesting/civil/rational conversation with my mother, not an easy task for me. The subject was horses. Not unusual considering my mother and I are both huge animal lovers. Well, as you will see, I am the huge one in her eyes. I was recounting a wonderful memory of several years past which entailed the riding of horses at Ethel's bosses' house. ( in second grade we have not yet been educated on the proper placement of apostrophes so I apologize if there is a glaring error. ) I was telling my mother about riding the most wonderful and dear Walter and Chief. (Walter is one of the horses, not Ethel's boss.) ((I guess my sidebar intention is tits up in the mud.)) My mother exclaimed in shock and horror: "YOU rode a horse!!??!! Were you still heavy back then!!??!! The horse must have known!!!!"
I hear my pharmaceuticals, as well as a big bowl of peanut M&Ms, calling my name.